When Anzu had to clean her room
by Misura
Summary: About to be enlisted for Anzu's spring-cleaning, Joey is rescued by an unexpected person. [SetoJoey]
1. Beginning

When Anzu had to clean her room

Warnings/notes : slightly weird, Seto/Joey, oocness, Anzu (Tea is something you drink I think ^^;), Ryou being called Ryou and Yami Bakura being called Bakura. 

Disclaimer : I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh. 

written at 20th july 2003, by Misura.

If you are allergic to even the slightest making fun of Anzu, you probably don't like this fic. If you can take a joke and have a normal sense of humor, you should be fine, I think.

**********

_"I love you, you foolish puppy." Kaiba whispered, leaning in for a kiss._

"Hmmm, love you too." Joey mumbled, fortunately for him in a soft enough voice not to be overheard by anyone else. He was in english class and they were supposed to read for themselves, so he had just made himself comfortable and dozed off.

_Kaiba's mouth was soft and warm._

Joey smiled as he licked his lips. He wasn't completely asleep ; a part of his mind was very well aware he was just day-dreaming. Still, fantasies like this one were way better than reading some boring english literary 'masterpiece'. Besides, it wasn't as if he'd ever be able to do more than dream. Kaiba'd laugh in his face if Joey'd ever told him how he felt.

Or worse ; he might be disgusted with the blond and avoid him for the rest of his life. That would be impossible to bear! Joey involuntarily shivered at the thought of never seeing Kaiba again.

A soft sound made him open his eyes, to find a folded piece of paper lying on his desk and Yugi gesturing at him to read it. He wondered what was so urgent that it couldn't wait until after classes ; couldn't Yugi see he had been busy? 

He opened the note.

_"Joey,_

_stay away from Anzu today if you value your spare time ; it's cleaning-time at her home again. Want to come and watch movies at my place later? Ryou and Bakura come too. Still have to ask Tristan ; you know where he is? Haven't seen him yet today._

_Yugi"_

Joey gave Yugi a thumbs-up to thank him for the warning. Anzu's cleaning-times were near-legendary ; she always asked all her friends to come and help her. Well, it sounded like she was asking you anyway, but saying 'no' wasn't really an option.

Anzu was nice, most of the time, but she could get terribly annoying if you crossed her. Not by getting mean or anything ; Joey could have handled that. No, Anzu used a version of Yugi's puppy eyes that was fatal even to the likes of Bakura, Ryou's violent yami.

Which meant that if Joey wouldn't stay clear of her, he was doomed to at least one afternoon of shrubbing and cleaning, for friendship's sake, in return for a glass of water and, if he was lucky, one of the cookies Anzu baked herself.

Last year, something had gone wrong with the timer of the oven and they had been burnt. Personally, Joey suspected Bakura had had something to do with that, but Anzu had never said anything about it.

Today, neither Yami nor Bakura was anywhere to be seen ; probably last year's experience had scared them too much to risk getting caught again. Joey shook his head sadly. Some people were such cowards! You'd think an ex-tombrobber wouldn't be afraid of a little dust.

As he started to pen down his answer to Yugi's invitation, the teacher walked back in. He hastily re-opened his book, pretending he was reading it. He didn't feel like ending up in detention.

While his eyes stared blindly at the pages, his mind wandered off again.

_Kaiba's eyes were of a sparkling blue as they gazed into his own, like ice on fire._

Joey smiled as his imagination provided him with snapshots of Kaiba laughing (with him, not at him), Kaiba kissing him, Kaiba buying him dinner ... His stomach grumbled at that last fantasy.

Someone behind him snickered.

"Class dismissed. Be sure to write a report about the book you read and turn it in coming Monday. Enjoy your weekend." The teacher managed to sound sincere, though it was beyond Joey how she could be ; he wouldn't have any time to 'enjoy his weekend' if he had to work on that stupid report now, would he?

Silently cursing all teachers and their assignments, he packed his bag and walked out of the classroom. To come face to face with a brown-haired, blue-eyed person he really didn't want to see, though his reason for that had slipped his mind at the moment.

"Hi, Joey!" Anzu beamed. "I was just looking for you!"

"Uh, oh? What for?" 

"I'm going to clean our house this weekend! You can come and help me." 

"But ... the report ... " Joey protested weakly.

"You can copy that from someone else." Anzu shrugged. "I have plenty, mostly because I *love* to write them. What book did you pick?"

"Uhm 'Jude the obscure'." At least, he thought that was it.

"Wow, Joey! That's one of my favorite books!" Anzu sounded very pleased. "So, you're coming?"

"Actually I have ... " _Think, Joey, think! _" ... an appointment. With a friend."

"With Yugi, you mean?" Anzu frowned for a moment, then cheered up again. "I was going to call him anyway, since I didn't catch him at school. So he'll probably cancel it."

Joey made a mental note to let Yugi know he might want to have his phone be out of work for the rest of the afternoon. *If* he managed to escape himself, that was.

"I didn't say it was Yugi." _Like I don't have plenty of other friends ... okay so maybe I don't. But it was still rude to put my nose on that fact._ "Actually, it's with ... with ... "

"With whom, Joey?" Anzu sounded suspicious. "You're not lying to me, are you?"

Joey wasted a few valuable seconds to wonder why she didn't have a problem with him copying her report, but did protest against him lying, while in fact he needed a name.

Honda and Ryou were off since they probably were on Anzu's recruitment list too. Mai was out of town, leaving ... 

"Kaiba." he squeaked. "I was going to see Kaiba after school. I promised."

That he had actually promised himself an afternoon of daydreamng about his fantasy-Kaiba, rather than visiting the real one was just a detail.

Anzu's eyes widened. "Kaiba is your *friend*?! But Joey, I thought the two of you *despised* eachother. What happened? Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"Well, I don't have to tell you *everything* now, do I? And we only became friends very recently ; it would be very bad if I didn't show up." Joey prayed fervently Kaiba had left the building already and wouldn't walk in on Joey declaring their friendship. 

"Yes, I can see that." Anzu nodded. She thought for a moment. 

"So I really have to - "

"He can come and help too!" Anzu offered generously. "Normally I only invite my *friends*, but if the two of you are befriended ... "

"Please, Anzu! The guy's the CEO of one of the biggest corporations in Japan! You can't - "

"Exactly. I bet he'd *love* to spend an afternoon on something as ordinary as cleaning! Remember how much Yami and Bakura enjoyed it last year? They had never done anything like it before too." 

Joey remembered indeed ; the two yamis had gone near hysterical at the sight of a broom or a dust-cloth for weeks after the incident, driving their hikaris insane.

He wondered how bad Kaiba was going to kill him if the CEO ever found out he had Joey to thank for being invited to Anzu's 'cleaning-party'. Though perhaps he was lucky and Anzu would get just one of his bodyguards. Guys like that could surely brush her off, right?

~to be concluded in the second part~


	2. Middle

When Anzu had to clean her room

Warnings/notes : slightly weird, Seto/Joey, hints at Yami/Yugi and Ryou/Bakura, oocness, Anzu (I still don't know how to accentuate her 'english' name to distinguish her from Tea ^^;), Ryou being called Ryou and Yami Bakura being called Bakura. 

Disclaimer : I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh. 

written at 21st july 2003, by Misura.

Chapter warning : Kaiba being mean to Anzu (not very ooc for him in my humble opinion)

**********

"Have you forgotten you were supposed to meet me three minutes ago or do you simply think I can wait, mutt?" Kaiba's cold voice interrupted Joey's frantic thoughts.

"I ... " he stammered, not exactly knowing what he was to say to that. He had only *fantasized* about his 'date' with Kaiba, hadn't he? So what on earth was Kaiba talking about?

"Kaiba-kun! I was just looking for you!" Anzu beamed. Joey fought down the urge to shove Kaiba out of her way and yell at him to make a run for it while he still could.

"Indeed? How unfortunate for you." Kaiba replied.

"Excuse me?" Anzu sounded confused.

"Unfortunate because I already have an appointment. And it's not with you."

"But ... " 

Joey knew Kaiba was only being his usual self and that his attitude towards Anzu had nothing to do with Joey being about to dragged off by her, yet part of him still basked in the feeling of having Kaiba stand up for him.

Besides, Anzu would get over it soon enough ; it wasn't as if she'd be heart-broken over neither Joey or Kaiba helping her cleaning.

"Are you coming, puppy?" Kaiba called over his shoulder as he walked away, ignoring Anzu's sputtering. For once, Joey chose not to take offense at the nickname, opting to postpone all hostilities between the two of them until after he was out of Anzu's reach.

Firmly keeping his mouth shut, he sprinted after Kaiba, headed for freedom.

And a bookreport of course, but there was time enough for that now later. Like, sunday evening.

*****

"Well, uhm ... I guess I'll see you again Monday then." Joey started awkwardly as they reached the gate, where Seto's car was waiting for him.

Kaiba raised one eyebrow. "You want to cancel our appointment?"

"What?" Joey blinked, then concluded Kaiba must be playing some sort of game with him, in revenge for Joey calling him his friend in public. Obviously Kaiba'd never have saved him if the CEO didn't have something to gain from it as well. "We don't have one. And as far as I'm concerned we'll never have one either."

Not because Joey didn't want to ; he dreamt about a date with Kaiba almost every night. He did have his pride though. He refused to let Kaiba make fun of his feelings.

"Shall I inform the charming Anzu then that you will be able to assist her with cleaning after all?" Kaiba inquired with a malicious gleam in his eyes as he drew out his cell-phone.

"Don't you dare!" Joey growled.

"Then get in the car."

"Fine then." Joey got in. "But I swear if you call me names one more time I'm out of here!"

Kaiba sat down in the seat next to him. "You bark awfully much, puppy. Someone should teach you some proper manners."

Joey glared at him, but remained where he was. Kaiba sighed.

"I'm sorry."

Brown eyes met blue ones, surprised as well as a little shocked. For a moment neither of them spoke. Joey because he wanted the moment to last, Kaiba for reasons unknown to the other.

"You're sorry?" Joey asked finally, his mouth gone dry.

Kaiba looked away. "That remark was way beyond your mental capacities to comprehend."

It took Joey's head a few moments to clear enough to understand he had been insulted yet again. He wondered if he'd just imagined the emotion he had seen in Kaiba's gaze.

*****

"So, you got Joey and Kaiba leaving school together in Kaiba's car. No big deal." Bakura commented to Yami as they stepped out of their hiding place.

"I will have you know it took me *hours* to get Kaiba to make that particular move and practically force Joey to go with him." Yami hissed.

Bakura smirked. "Just goes to show how weak your powers of persuasion are now that you can't order people around anymore. I could have done it much faster."

"Unfortunately he hates you too much to even listen to you for a mere minute." Yami retorted.

"Some people simply lack any trace of intelligence." Bakura grumbled. "In that, they fit eachother perfectly. Stubborn, oblivious idiots."

Yami snorted. "And you, of course, knew straight away you loved your hikari and didn't merely see him as a body to control for your own purposes."

"It's not love." Bakura glared. "I just like to f- "

"We're not here to discuss your relationship with your hikari." Yami interrupted him. "We were here to see if I could get Kaiba and Joey together. Which I just did. Our ways part here."

"You proved *nothing*." Bakura hissed angrily. "If I see them holding hands tomorrow, perhaps I'll be more convinced, but at the moment they're still fighting."

Yami shrugged. "I should have known you'd never admit defeat in any form. Have it your way then ; I know what I know."

"Yeah, well, I know something too." Bakura replied, looking at someone else leaving the school, headed in their general direction. "Unless you want to end up shrubbing the floors again, we'd better high-tail it out of here now and warn our hikaris not to answer the phone."

Yami's eyes narrowed. "I'm not afraid of some *girl*. Not even Anzu."

Bakura grinned, giving him a shove in said person's direction while following his own advice. As a former tomb-robber he knew the benefits of running away when the odds were bad.

~uhm ... to be concluded in the third chapter? I really meant to wrap things up in this one ... ~


	3. Ending

When Anzu had to clean her room

Warnings/notes : slightly weird, Seto/Joey, hints at Yami/Yugi and Ryou/Bakura, oocness, Anzu, Ryou being called Ryou and Yami Bakura being called Bakura. 

Disclaimer : I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh. 

written at 23rd july 2003, by Misura.

A/N : A very big 'Thank you!' to all those who reviewed and  made me post this chapter a day before I'd planned to post it.

**********

"Here we are." Kaiba said as he got out of the car.

Joey looked up at the mansion warily. "This is your house."

"Right at once. Had you expected me to have some other destination?"

"Well ... " A part of him had -foolishly- hoped Kaiba would simply drop him off at his own house.

"Follow me." Kaiba walked up to the door, after having opened the front-gate with some pass-key. Joey, reasoning Mokuba's presence would make this place reasonably safe for him, walked after him.

"Mokuba's staying over at a friend's house for a few days." Kaiba remarked nonchalantly, tossing his bookcase on some table. "Would you like something to drink?"

Joey wondered if Kaiba'd stoop as low as to spike it. Probably not, but perhaps he'd better take no risks. This was starting to smell like a set-up. "Not really."

"Something to eat then?" Kaiba sounded slightly peeked. 

Before Joey could politely decline that too, his stomach answered the question for him by rumbling loudly. "Uhm ... "

"I'll take that as a 'yes'." Kaiba grinned and gestured for Joey to follow him again. "Let's see if we can find something to your liking in our kitchen. Mokuba's rather fond of snacking too, so we can expect a reasonable supply of unhealthy food."

"You only eat healthy stuff or something?" Joey flapped out. He didn't really thought about whether or not something was 'healthy' ; food just had to taste good. Besides, there were vegetables on a pizza too, and vegetables were good, weren't they?

"I have to lead a corporation *and* go to school." Kaiba shrugged. "I can't simply eat what I like."

Joey failed to see the connection, so he limited his answer to a groan.

*****

"I *hate* to eat alone." Joey complained.

He and Kaiba had settled in the living-room of the mansion, with some bags of chips and marshmallows. The combination had made Kaiba shudder, though Joey had cheerfully declared he liked some change in his diet.

Joey's dislike to eating without company hadn't kept him from munching down half a bag of marshmallows already, or from starting on a bag of chips just now, so Kaiba hardly felt pressed to keep Joey from starving by amending his refusal to eat something too.

"I already told you I can't eat whatever I want." he replied stiffly.

Joey sighed. "Come on, indulging for one time can't hurt can it?" He threw in a puppy-look for effect. His wasn't as cute as Yugi's, but he was working on it.

"I ... suppose not." Kaiba reluctantly admitted.

"That's the spirit!" Joey grinned in triumph. "Now what do you want? I'll be generous and have you pick whatever you want." He gestured to the bags that were still unopened. That they were in fact all Kaiba's (or rather, Mokuba's, which made claiming them even more perilous) seemed to have slipped his mind for the moment. Kaiba didn't seem to notice either.

Instead, he was eyeing Joey pensively. "You will let me have a taste of whatever I want?"

There was something about that statement that made Joey blink and wonder what he was missing here. "As long as it's in this room." he added cautiously, slightly unsure whether or not that was the right thing to add.

Kaiba's almost predatory smirk told him it wasn't.

"Oh, what I want definitely is in this room." he purred.

Joey wasn't sure anymore whether he wanted to run as far away from this weird-acting Kaiba or wanted to start purring too and feed Kaiba some marshmallows, like he had done in one of his dreams. Or should he try chips?

A mistake at this point might mean the end of this dream-come-true. Joey wasn't willing to let that happen, not when things were finally starting to look up.

While Joey wrestled with this dilemma, Kaiba walked over to where he was sitting.

"Joey ... " 

The blond turned his head to ask what Kaiba wanted ...

... just in time to feel the other's lips on his, while the bag of chips on his lap creaked in protest since Kaiba hadn't bothered to remove it and Joey hadn't had time.

He gazed wonderingly into sparkling, blue eyes. "What did you do *that* for?"

"I love you, you foolish puppy." Kaiba whispered, leaning in for another kiss, with a hint of uncertainty in his voice. Yami had assured him Joey felt the same, which was the only reason he was being so straighforward now, but what if the spirit had been wrong?

Or worse, what if it had all been a prank?

Joey giggled. "Not the kiss you silly. Though it's nice to know and I love you too."

"Then what are you talking about?" Kaiba demanded, a little offended his declaration had been brushed off so lightly. Perhaps he should have cut the puppy part. "Whatever it is, it's not important right now."

He was surprised as Joey pushed him away. Surprised, and a little bit hurt.

"Look at this!" Joey held up a rather crumpled bag of chips. According to its package it contained Cheese/Tomato-tasted potato chips. Kaiba failed to see its importance.

"What about that?"

Joey glared at him indignantly. "These are Original Golden Tomache Chips! And you just crushed them! Don't you know what you have done?!?"

Kaiba decided a kiss was probably the best way to stop Joey from ranting on. He was right.

~OWARI, or rather almost~

Some loose ends :

- Yami reached home in time to keep Yugi from picking up the phone. The two of them spent the weekend eating ice-cream and watching TV, amongst others, since Yugi's bookreport was already done on Friday night.

- Bakura was distracted on the way. As he arrived home, Ryou was already talking to Anzu, prompting his panicked yami to snatch the horn out of his hand and wreck the phone. Needless to say Ryou wasn't very happy about that, but Bakura managed to coax him into coming to his room to 'work on the book report'. They spent most of the weekend there, coming out for food and a certain anime-show Bakura would never admit to watch.

Ryou had finished his bookreport last week, when they first heard about the assignment.

- Anzu spent the weekend cleaning her house. She also baked her cookies, even if there was no one to share them with and ate them all herself, as some sort of comfort. Feeling guilty about not sharing them with her friends, she made another bunch which she took to school at Monday.

- Joey stayed over at Kaiba's. On Sunday evening, Kaiba picked a book-report for him from the Internet, thus earning Joey his first A-. Kaiba, like Ryou, had finished his own last week.

~OWARI, for real this time~


End file.
